I'm falling. Not sort of and not maybe.. I'm falling in love with Stu. I told him on Saturday. He just stared at me and kissed me more deeply than ever before.
I've never known a man of such passion. His emotions are real and they're potent and it doesn't take much to spark his fire. I'm learning so much about what a healthy communicative relationship is about. How to speak your thoughts and voice your feelings even (and especially) when it's difficult.
The way he'll sputter over his words, pause and formulate them in the prettiest way he can. That look on his face.. him biting his lip as he shakes his head back and forth. He's so patient with me and my inappropriate and playful shenanigans. Met my mother and did exceptionally well. With daddy, he was a bit more hesitant. I kind of bullied him into it, which was wrong of me. He had his own reasoning for wanting to wait, and while it made no sense to me, it really wasn't my place to force the issue. We talked it out (passionately) and landed on the same conclusion: above all else, we want each other.
I have never known anything quite like it. Loved before, yes. Deeply. But my previous substantial relationship was more like a deep friendship that happened to be physical. With Stu the affections feel magnetic and natural. His touch is electric, never felt anything like it. While it's apparent we will both have to actively work to keep the kinetic sparks alive, there's no denying it'll be worth the efforts. He lights me up.
Workday's ending, but tomorrow I'll talk of the abundant love in OTHER areas of my life. To say I am blessed would be the ultimate understatement. It's hard to comprehend it's even real, this life I lead. Magic, I say. Miraculous magic.
